Truly transformational counseling, prt. 2
Today I want to give you the last five of ten questions and issues you may end up considering in counseling that is deeply transformational.
6. Where is God in the darkest, nastiest places in your life? We know God is with us, so wherever you are, God is there too. But what is God speaking to you in those places? Certainly those are the places that are rich with opportunity for growth, and for opening up to love and joy. “The people living in darkness have seen a great light!”
7. Where are you standing in your own way? Despite your sincere desire to grow and change, how are you actually preventing yourself from doing so? I promise you this is happening.
8. Hardest of all of these is looking deeply into what got you to where you are today. Usually there is immense grief and a lot of self-loathing associated with those things in people’s lives, and a lot of grieving may need to be done, under the guidance of someone who can keep reminding you that this is deeply spiritual work. Don’t freak it out by demanding that it be couched in a lot of scripture, and don’t be paranoid about it if it doesn’t seem “Christian” enough. Just keep asking yourself if it is leading you toward truth. Jesus, the Christian God, claimed to not only know truth, but to be the truth! Anything that is leading you towards truth is getting you closer to God. Relax and let it happen.
9. How is your relationship with God mirrored in your relationship with your spouse and children? This is useful because it helps to move God from abstract to concrete. We cannot love people differently than we love God, or vice versa.
10. Be assured that the promised land DOES exist, and it HAS been already given to you! But there are chains you will need to have removed if you are ever going to get there. That’s your work. God’s work is providing the land for you, and taking you there if you are willing to fight the battles, learn to listen carefully, and endure the dark days in the desert where you may often feel like going back to the way it was would be easier.
Question: Any stories about counseling that ended up transforming you in some ways that ended up hurting you or people you love? (We can’t assume all therapists are coming from a place that is helpful.)